The joy of doing a lot of nothing.

August 18, 2010 Evolutionary

I’m still the only retreatant in this whole, gorgeous place called San Damiano.  Groups come during the day but there are no other private retreats.  It’s like having a Spanish villa all to myself.  Today, I got to help out in the bookstore.  I started by taking inventory and soon graduated to re-designing displays, re-arranging things all around and turning their bookshelves into visually interesting areas to shop.  When Estrella found out I used to own a bookstore, she was thrilled to let me have some fun.  And I did have a lot of fun.  It felt healing actually considering I just blogged about the stinging remnants of Many Paths Bookstore.  Just as with Many Paths, as soon as we changed up an area, there was a sale; as soon as we put small, pick-through items at the register, browsers ate ’em up.  Before I’d been at it an hour, the bookstore brought in over $200 in just a few minutes.  LOL.  Estrella was so excited.  I just laughed, grateful to share some of my own retail experience.  I was also able to tell her where to find meditation bowls, cushions and really good journals.  She asked if I would come back for Christmas decorating!!  What easy therapy – and it was free!  We had a great and grateful time.

Canticle Garden with Labyrinth...such peace.

After a bountiful lunch – the food here is really, really good with home-grown vegetables and herbs and homemade cookies every day – I was able to do a lot of nothing.  Even after a quick espresso at Peet’s, I lounged around the gardens and went for a long walk through the woods behind the property.  I saw Sister Deer and her 2 fawns again and she just looked at me from about 25 feet away….her big black eyes trying to figure me out.  She eventually turned and walked away.  It was a beautiful moment to look into her eyes and then say, “I’m not here to hurt you.  I love you.”  She seemed satisfied.

The walk was nurturing with so many fallen trees and a carpet of gold leaves all around.  Lots of different kinds of trees, and when I looked up, there were swatches of blue sky.  It’s been breezy today, so it was just me and the sound of the leaves riding the wind.  No books, no journal, no music…just walking without anything in my hand or in my mind.  I wondered what it would take for humanity to catch the slightest glimpse of God.  As I felt the Presence of God everywhere, could see it everywhere, I understood at the deepest level that I am one with nature, with all of life.  Of course, I know this and have experienced it profoundly over the years, but it’s infinitely magical when the sense of it is so powerful and yet, so simple…so clearly simple.

Striking...I stared at this maple for a long time.

It’s not more consciousness that we need.  We have all that we could ever acquire…it is already within us to its most full capacity, to its greatest potential.  Can we awaken to this truth?  Can we step beyond the fear of facing this mystical presence that lives us?  Can we abandon our selfishness for selflessness?  It’s not that we need more awareness, but we cover up our souls with clinging, grasping, envy, resentment, perceptions that have no basis in Truth, society’s ideas of what will make us happy, doing, doing and more doing….and for what?  So they can say at the end, “He did his life?”  We’re so covered up with the trivial, it’s surprising we’re not all gasping for air as we do the doing.  Maybe we are…we’re just really good at not letting it show.  What would happen if we let it show? 

Now, it’s really chilly and windy…my fingers are too cold to type.  With the moon again visible before the sun has set, I say goodnight and sleep tight.  While you sleep, let love lead the way.  Namaste.


Entry Filed under: Consciousness, Love, Spirituality

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